Category: Inspiration

Are you part of an internet generation?

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As an early adopter, how seriously do I need take my role as an elder millennial?

Somehow generations on the internet have developed into these social memes of groups that we are all supposed to fit into. I am not a sociologist, so I don’t claim to be able to go deep into what this says about internet culture, but these factions do interest me. For me, I like the fact that I grew up in the pre-internet era and was an early adopter of social media. That, and my age of course, means that I am the classical elder millennial (I believe defined as post 1980 to 1985 birthday ). Mainly on Instagram, I have seen these arguments brewing. Nearly 40-year-olds, do you remember when everyone turned on us for wearing skinny jeans and side partings?

These simplistic definitions of generations fascinate me. I mean no-one is going to stop me wearing my hair how I like: you’ve guessed it, it’s in a mum-bun. But also, because it speaks to a wider sense of wanting to be defined as something. This can lead to very dismissive (and often quite funny) complaints about former generations. I remember being amused when I first came across the “ok, Boomer” memes online, particularly if we are being told to give up avocado toast so we can buy property in London. The criticism of a certain type of journalism that has frequently dismissed the cost-of-living crisis is very valid. I don’t think I need to demonstrate why someone could afford a house in 1970 that I would never be able to buy now.

Memes to make you giggle are here




But knowing as I do that the attitude of being dismissive and critical of younger generations work ethic, financial planning and fashion choices does not in the most part represent the opinion of Boomers I know, I have to question the value of grouping people in this way. Not least because some of these same Boomers we are criticising, are also the first and second wave feminists that I have admired so much. Feminism as a word goes in and out of fashion although I strongly believe getting to choose to be a feminist is a privilege that most, including these women, could not afford.

To reject the roles of your forebears, through this lens, is to ignore a series of important histories that have led us to these freedoms. If you annoyed at how your manager treats you do you remember she would have been rejected for management before the 1970s because of her gender? It is very possible someone sent her a letter to refuse her application as they don’t accept female candidates for management (I mention this example because I know L’Oreal did this to my Mum). Again, by all means have a joke at the expense at your manager who doesn’t know how to use excel, but don’t assume a general incompetence. Just as I find some mum jokes lazy, I am more interested in why we make these generalisations.

By all means, reject the fashions of the past, if it embarasses you. I mean, who hasn’t seen a photo of themselves and wondered what they were thinking. Fortunately for me, being an early millennial means my fashion mistakes are mostly not online. But I do wonder when we divide into these groups with these broad brushstrokes, if we lose out on the past and out rich and varied histories. A meme is a social joke, a collective understanding which can feel fun when your part of it – which is why I find jokes about Boomers funnier than the ones about my own generation- but it is also pretty dismissive.

I have been writing about a multi-generational family of strong women and, in a sense, they represent different types of womanhood. I suppose my research into the younger generation as I write about it has led me down the path to examine differences between us. But there are no quick, easy explanations of how you are formed into who you are, often it is through a series of circumstances, possibly privileges and through the art and media you consume. What then of these simplistic explanations of a whole generation? Well as an “elder,” wisdom tells me that it’s just another bad meme. Laugh at it sure, but please don’t think we are all the same.

Developing Your Ideas

~ MumWriteNow ~ 4 Comments

How to get a spurt of writing energy when you get the chance to write

The end of the month comes all too quickly in February. This is a relief when you look at your bank balance, but when it comes to reflecting on what you have written it is almost a bit too soon. When I reviewed my January work, I posited that sometimes the work is done off paper by letting your ideas fester. However it did also push me to work more this month, knowing I would be updating the blog with what I had achieved.

So despite half term (and ill health yet again,) the good news is I wrote two new scenes for my motherhood project. One was prompted by an old photo. Because as much as I feel like I remember those early days, writing about the early years and the joys of toddlers has been blotted out by later tears and tantrums (and joys of course.) My own memories, along with knowing my characters better, helped me develop a scene where we see the strain of dealing with a difficult child through the impact it has on their parents.

The other scene I developed was on the back of the character profiles I have been developing. I wrote recently about avoiding clichés in my writing by using character profile worksheets. I love this activity to get the ideas flowing. I took this a step further and wrote a scene where the antagonist met up with my main character. I had identified both her flaws and the obstacles she faces so that both characters are more fully formed when they interact.

Just thinking about what next…

To really develop the idea, I wrote the scene from the antagonist’s first person and then rewrote it from the main character’s viewpoint. This was a technique that I learnt in a writing class that I would recommend. It is a really good way to develop the scenes because you have full awareness of what each character’s intentions are and are more aware of the tension between the two or more people. Whilst I highly recommend this idea, I would also caution not always do this. I have swathes of writing where the viewpoints have got mixed up either conciously or unconciously. This may be a style you choose to adopt, but it is best to choose a viewpoint and stick to it at least in the first draft.

Finally, to really develop your ideas, I like to leave an unfinished sentence at the end of your writing time. This week I finished the scene where the main character has been allowed into the home of the antagonist and at the end we know she has been invited out to an event. I know now that I have to write next about the event or at least the aftermath so I am setting my brain up to fester on that idea whenever I get back to the paper again.

I would love to hear any tips and tricks you use to keep going at your writing projects.

Avoiding the Cliché

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When you’re writing down a well worn path, it’s hard not to stumble upon clichés along the way

I wrote recently about trying to avoid the pitfalls of the same old motherhood jokes. This is because I have been trying to write about the experience of motherhood in an honest and hopefully comic way. And it is hard not to fall into the same patterns of jokes.

I have followed this advice before to find your characters quirks, often a short hand for their personality. I like this on one level, trying to find everyone’s inner Amélie. But writing these also can become little too much to read, if everyone is blushing all the time or always holding a coffee cup, are you going to notice the tension between these two people or just notice how often the writer repeats themselves.

Character development worksheets are a great way to feel your way into more depth. I certainly enjoy the listing process of the background things that only you know about them. Horoscopes, their earliest memory, what car they drive – thinking at least some of these things is helpful way to world-build around the characters so that they start to become real. These lists are particularly useful if you are lacking inspiration or brain gets fogged like mine. Lady Writer on Pinterest has an amazing array of resources. I was using a great one this week about character quirks.

It’s amazing how thinking about their inner life, can spark you into other ideas, for example the character who is obsessed with her horoscope, may become the more susceptible character or she becomes more empathetic to other’s emotions albeit because she knows when mercury is in retrograde. The “perfect” character may have many more quirks than the other women in her life, she just works even harder to hide them.

Ultimate quirkiness. How is Amélie twenty years old?

Once the characters are a little more fleshed out, you begin to write about someone you know. Less drawn from a stock character and more from an understanding of how that person acts. And then, the characters start to tell you what to write. I had a battle with a character who keeps trying to take over my other work-in-progress.

The final thing to avoid clichés may depend on your writing style. I have been trying to write from start to finish in my newest project, usually I have written scenes when I am inspired which has landed me in quite a mess of thousands of words for the aforementioned other project, where the puzzle isn’t quite fitting together. What I would say being a bit stricter writing my story in this more planned out way is that I don’t avoid clichés at all. Just as names are stand-ins for the name I choose in the end, sometimes trying to plod through a first draft means having the confidence that you will go back and flesh out the writing. And brain-fogged, sporadic writers like me need to use clichés to get to the end of the scene whenever they eventually sit down.

Good ideas have to fester

~ MumWriteNow ~ 1 Comment

Creating something doesn’t always mean getting it down on paper…

In Big Magic, Elizabeth Gilbert talks about grabbing hold of the tail of an ethereal idea and holding on to it before it flies away. I certainly agree that you have to be open and living a creative life for ideas to develop more easily, but her thoughts that ideas can fly away terrifies me. I wrote before how I was motivated by her book but I also feel a different process happens for me with an idea as it forms.

This month I have focused on my motherhood project, I promised to update on the blog more often how my projects are going and in a way I am ashamed to say I have only written another 900-odd words. That’s less than a day’s worth in NanoWriMo! But it is also a sign that I have an idea developing. I was unsure whether there was much scope for the project when I reviewed my year, but a spark came out of writing my Morning Pages.

One of my favourite posts is my Imperfect Guide to Morning Pages . The truth is, it is not always the serene ideal of morning journalling that the internet sells us, but it is certainly a great practice. Reminding myself to use those pages to work out the niggles often prooves effective and if you haven’t yet used Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way – I think it’s essential developing creativity and unblocking your ideas. So along with writing a gratitude diary at the end of each day, I am back at my pages. Bookending my days with the most important things: writing (and reading of course.)

I sometimes remember to write in cafes, not just eat!

And this is why I feel it is alright for my ideas to fester away in the quagmire of my foggy brain. A stewed on idea often comes out more clearly than trying to grasp at the mere suggested ingredients that come to you at first. It’s a slow way to cook up something new but I feel it was a bit more fully formed when I sat down to write. Knowing that I have managed a writing session as well as journalling feels encouraging too. When I review next month’s work, I will have a bit more to report as the characters and relationships develop and more scenes grow in my head. The hope is more of these ideas will have made it to the page.

How’s your writing month been?

Books that raised me

~ MumWriteNow ~ 1 Comment

Revisiting a book from my childhood has made me reflect on which books stayed with me, in fact shaped me.

I was recently rereading Ballet Shoes, a book that was such a favourite from my childhood that it was a gift from my mother, who knew it would give me great comfort to reread it. I think I was surprised to learn how much I remembered, including what was said and also how it made me feel as a child. These earliest books stuck with me, and affected me deeply as a child.

Ballet Shoes is a book about three adopted girls – the Fossils, – who get the chance to go to stage school, Noel Streatfield wrote many different stories where little girls achieve their dreams, including White Boots which was another favourite book of mine all about an ice skater. Though the story maintains the desire that these little girls: Pauline, Posie and Petrova maintain their ladylike qualities, they must learn certain manners from the inimitable Academy head Madame, for example, it still spoke to me. A product of a different time that valued propriety more highly, it is quite dated on a reread. But it is also empowering. Unsurprisingly for a children’s tale, they overcome their obstacles and achieve what was certainly my dream as a child: to act, to dance.

Another few book series from my childhood, helped my obsession with the theatre including Dream of Sadler’s Wells by Lorna Hill and The Swish of the Curtain and the rest of the series by Pamela Brown. These books shaped my life because I was obsessed with theatre. My aunt had been to ballet school and these books were remnants from her childhood that got passed down to me along with a make-up box with real greasepaints. I went to numerous dance classes growing up, and performed in contemporary dance pieces as a teen. I was part of a theatre group and was in musicals during each summer holiday. These books seemed like my destiny.

As it turns out, I didn’t end up pursuing my dream of drama school. Of course I know a handful of people who did make it to drama school and even made careers from our shared childhood start, but in the most all-singing, all-dancing children don’t all “make it”. Boring reality is that not quite so many doors open in real lives as the children in these books. But even though I didn’t end up a ballerina or a musical theatre star, revisiting these childhood memories help tap into something that can bring me joy.

Rereading these books has opened that part of my heart that dreamed big, even if it was unlikely. That childlike quality to see possibility should never leave us. Being an adult is so uninspiring if we don’t sometimes at least indulge in the dreams of the things that could happen. Now I know that the only way to make dreams a reality is real actionable goals, but I also believe that the creative adult, is the child who survived. These books remind me of that but also prompt me to take action.

Time to dust the dance shoes?

At the back of my wardrobe is a pair of ballet shoes and a pair of tap shoes. I have promised myself as I get better I will reach for them again this year. Reaching for them because your old hobbies are languishing in their hiding place collecting dust is a good enough reason. But really I know that reaching for a part of myself from my childhood sparks for me the creative and expressive person I really am.